Finally, this is the moment I have been waiting for my whole life, Senior Year. The time when I am the eldest among the youngest, and the wisest amongst the foolish. There has been so much building up to this year that I can't help but wonder where all of the time has gone. I have reached that scary point where what actually occurs in the movies is somewhat relevant to my own life. Where I can find myself within the books I read and can find familiarity in the tales that others tell of their own "teenhood".

Senior Year. The more I say it, the more I hope that it will sink in. It's the dawn of a new era, and the ending of a world that was so familiar to me not-so-long ago. "It is a whole new experience!" they say, "Enjoy it!" they cry and "You will miss it!"they assure me. Miss it. It? I never really understood what it was until a few afternoons ago. While sitting the chilly mall theater with a few of my old friends, I watched as the characters contemplated the culminating events of their own Senior Year. The year full of first and last times, full of it.
“I'd had nearly four years of experience looking at these clocks, but their sluggishness never ceased to surprise. If I am ever told that I have one day to live, I will head straight to the hallowed halls of Winter Park High School, where a day has been known to last a thousand years.”
― John Green, Paper Towns   

And where a year has been know to last an eon. An entire lifetime gone in the blink of an eye. A whole world where time is spent following a repetitive schedule, doing things that you will probably never do again. That my friends is it. The people, the memories, the fears, the laughs, the mistakes and yes, even the classes. It,  a two letter word with a double meaning. It itself contains all of the moments that make up life. All of life's fleeting moments that will never happen again, but that will never leave you the same way.

You will remain forever changed, but in order for this change to take place, you need to be present. You cannot keep waiting until the next Senior Year, or the next big chapter in your life, you need to willingly turn the page. You need mount your trusty steed, sword in hand, and gallop in the search of it.

As John Green wrote in the book Paper Towns, “At some point, you gotta stop looking up at the sky, or one of these days you'll look back down and see that you floated away, too.” While I am not thrilled that school is starting, I am excited for this new year, to finally stop floating and begin rising to the occasion. I look forward to not just floating amidst the clouds, but taking control of the winds and blow them in the right direction. While, the beginning of Senior Year may be green light that launches me onto the right path, I can assure you that the ending of it will not be marked with a red or yellow light. I will not pass Go and collect my 200 dollars, I will speed up and reach new heights. And while I don't know what is in store, but in the words of John Green, I do know how I will feel,

"Young. Goofy. Infinite.”

― John Green, Paper Towns  


~Alexandra XO 

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